Who Inspires You

It can not be said that there is any one person that inspired me. It was every story I heard and every person I meet who had learned how to deal with and control their bipolar or other mood and social disabilities. Though the symptoms manifested as a teenager they did not go over the edge until my early 20s. The diagnosis came down 3 years ago. I have bipolar type 1 and social anxiety I issues. I was 35 at the time.

I had no idea what was wrong with me but I knew something was so I went to doctor after doctor until someone paid attention. My psychiatrist was my first step in trusting in and listening to others on what I needed to do to get myself in control. I gave many thanks to my doctor at the time. She was and is a top-notch psychiatrist. that is a compliment I have never given any other counselor or therapist.

I quite smoking cigarettes, I got off the caffeine, and I stopped drinking. I do not watch shows that trigger my episodes and I have had to ask people to leave until I got better control of my episodes. I have gone threw so many meds until we found the right ones that I have lost count. We have finally found three that actually keep me fairly even.

I have conquered the impulse spending almost totally and I have taken care of the risky sexual behavior completely. People actually like me know and even take the time to get to know me, which was impossible before the cognitive therapy and meds.

Due to lack of funds and transportation, you have a very hard time working with uncontrolled bipolar, I did my own research. I taught myself about cognitive behavior therapy and spent long painful hours working on changing my self-view and my self-esteem. Without positive thought it is hard for anyone and especially for those who have mental illness to get themselves to a position of feeling “normal”.

Also without a solid support system like my mom and my friends Julia, Jo-Jo, Dave and Rick I would have never made it. I cannot pick just one person. There were too many on my road to healing that I cannot and I will not pick one over another.

In three years I have turned my life around and fought so I could be “normal”. In addition, become someone that somebody could be proud of and I have done that .So I guess it can be said that with my support system and desire to be healthy in the end I can add myself to the list of who inspires me.